“Constructive” Criticism

My new diet is called the Paleolithic Diet, or Caveman diet.  The broad stroke idea is that you eat only things that were eaten by humans for the majority of our evolution.  Meat, seeds and nuts, meat, low density carb veggies, meat, some fruit, and absolutely no grains or non-fruit sugars.  I work out using Crossfit methodology, which is highly intense and varied functional exercises.  Assuming you, the reader, didn’t quickly push the back button on your browser when seeing words like “equation” and “delicious confection”, I would like to respond to a few criticisms of my new lifestyle I’ve received.

Diet: “You shouldn’t deprive your body of something you enjoy (sugars and grains), you should only cut back”

• I know that it is bad for my body to eat grains and sugars, to continue to put any amount of these substances into my body would be completely irrational, even if I do like them.  Really, it is different than something like cocaine only in magnitude.

• Along the same lines as cocaine, the insulin reaction to these substances is like a drug, and I’m an addict.  You wouldn’t tell a cocaine addict to just cut back.

Exercise: “You should start slow until you are in a better position and at a healthier weight before you start intense workouts”

• If you start easy, you quit easy.
• I know my limits, I know that my limits aren’t my REAL limits, and I know that I need to push my REAL limits to get any kind of benefit from any excercise program, or I’ll simply end up treading water.
• I’m not 22 any more.

Body Image: “Why can’t you just be happy the way you are?”

• Chicks dig scars, but not triple bypass scars.
• If I was, my sense of happiness would be really fucked up.
• I seriously couldn’t believe a good friend of mine asked me this.  My response to him was “Are you out of your fucking mind?”  And I think the thing that bothered me the most about this is that if he had asked me a year ago, I would have believed that I was happy the way I was.